If you have been reading my blog for awhile then I’m guessing (and hope) you have caught on to a few things about me:
1) I love the LORD
2) Jesus is my Savior and example
3) I love my husband and think he’s pretty great
4) I have a thing for Culver’s and ice cream in general
5) I think books are one of the greatest inventions ever
And some other things… anyhoo…
The third thing on that list is something I take for granted now. I really do love my husband. I also really, really like him. I respect him. I admire him. I think he’s a cutie. I think he’s a wonderful father and husband.
Basically, I like spending time with him and I’m beyond grateful that I get to spend the rest of my life on Earth with him. I like being with him. I like just sitting and chatting with him. I like laughing with him, being silly with him, working with him and playing with him. And I’m glad you can tell.
Here’s the thing, I don’t see this obvious fondness in lots of couples. When a friend told me how she admired that I show my fondness, I was relieved. I don’t want to look like some of the couples I see, even in my little circle of life. I started noticing it years ago and decided to make sure I didn’t look like what I was seeing. I want everyone to know (especially my children) that I am thrilled to be married… for life… to this man! This is not truly conveyed if you just say it, you have to live it.
Instead of fondness, too often I see: irritation, toleration, exasperation, and tedium. Sadly, I see women who are mostly rolling their eyes (not in humor, but in annoyance), who are correcting with voice or body stance, or who look like they could be sitting next to any man, not the man they cherish.
I’m not talking about the every once in awhile things. I’m not talking about the occasional sin nature we all have that flares up. We’re not perfect, I know Though, even during those times, we should honor our husbands.. I’m not even talking about thinking your husband has no flaws for you to pray about. I’m talking about the representative way of how we behave around our husbands.
For example, while on my mini-vacation I was able to meet a friend’s aunt and uncle. Jo Gail and Tony were endearing to me for several reasons, but the top one was their obvious love for each other. They way they spoke to each other, laughed with each other, and looked at each other left no doubt that these two cared very deeply for one another and loved being together. They were fun to be around. They were the kind of example of marriage that makes you smile. And makes you think, “This is the kind of marriage songs are written about.”
Ladies, let’s search our hearts and seek the LORD for how we feel about our husbands. Then, once we see how we truly feel, seek the LORD to help us show that or (if we need to work on how we feel about our husbands) how we should feel about our husbands. Next, “praise him in the gates”. Without being obnoxious (and I don’t think applauding him during board games is obnoxious, YouKnowWho!) or inappropriate (some behaviors and comments are for you two alone, though Pioneer Woman doesn’t seem to agree), make sure he knows it and that others don’t wonder if you even like your husband all that much.
It doesn’t take a lot of effort. Smiling at him. Laughing at his jokes. Holding his hand. Giving him a peck on the cheek when you walk by him. Letting him talk. Choosing to sit by him. Agreeing with him in a conversation. Hugging him. Looking him in the eye and really listening to him.
Show your fondness.
I promise it will bless him, bless your children, bless those who are watching and bless you.